Nakota

So today was really not a good day. I had to put my dog, Nakota, to sleep this morning. Something inside of him ruptured, either something that he ate that got stuck, or cancer that he had. Either way, he was really sick, and it was best for him. But I really miss him. He's the last of the animals that I grew up with. I remember sleeping on the living room floor in a sleeping bag the first 4 months he lived with us because he was afraid to be alone. We just had a connection. And now he's gone. But he was definitely not a dog that you easily forget, anyone who knew him will agree. I don't like saying 'knew' instead of 'knows'. But I can't change it, and it was the best thing for him, but I'll miss him. That just started off a day that really wasn't very good, at all, for many reasons. But I miss my boy.

Just things I guess

So, I don't know if anyone even reads these things anymore, I know I occassionally check them, but not often. I just felt the need to write here. A lot has happened since the last time I updated, and there's no way I can even begin to summarize it here. Or anywhere else for that matter. Junior year has been...interesting. I guess that's the best word for it. There have been many, many bad things, as well as many good. I'm not sure how I feel about it. I know that it's been the hardest year so far, and as I don't see senior year as being all the difficult, I think I agree with it being the hardest year. The schoolwork definitely sucks, I hate it. I really don't like school, except for the fact that it gets me out of the house. I'm not sure that even makes it worth it anymore. There are so many things going on, in my head and otherwise, I'm just very confused. And torn. And I know I'm just rambling here, but I haven't done that in a while, and it feels kinda nice. There's a lot of things I want to say, but can't. All I can say is, I feel like I'm heading in a direction that I'm not sure I want to go, but I don't know what to do or how to change it. So yeah, fun stuff, oh, and we start school on my birthday. Isn't that great? Happy birthday...let's go to school! Lol.

Summer is Ending

School is way too close for comfort now. School starts in a week. I'm not ready. This summer seems like it has been so short, and I haven't even really done anything. Usually when I don't do much I get bored and then school isn't too bad. But this time, I dunno, something's different. I haven't figured out what it is yet. It's been a weird summer. And I don't want to go to school, because I'm a junior now, and I have a feeling this year is going to kick my ass. Big time. Although I think I have a few classes with my friends this year, so that should help, I hope. I wonder what this year will be like. I wonder what will change, if anything. But it's almost inevitable that something will. But not like we can do anything about it, so oh well. So here's to enjoying our last week of summer.

scared

I haven't been this scared in a very long time. I have no idea what to do. I don't even know if there is anything that I can do. I don't think my life is going to be the same for a while, perhaps a long time. But I can't change it. I feel so helpless, and I hate that. I just don't know what to do...

Updating again

So, once again it has been a long time since I have written anything. A lot has happened, but the summer isn't even halfway over yet. I wonder what next year is going to be like? Andrew and Franklin are seniors, and the rest of us (you know who you are) are juniors. That is weird. I wonder what's going to happen next? Our group has already changed in so many ways, and gone so many different directions. Oh well, I guess we shall see. I don't really have anything to say, except that I'm a dork. Yup, tis true, and you all know it. I made another nation on that nationstates.net thing, and I still use my neopets accounts to play games. Yeah, I know, I'm pathetic, but I don't really care,lol. Anyway, hope everyone's summer is good, and people should update theirs too.

So it's been a while since I posted. I think it's been a while since anyone has posted, besides Eryn, and that today as well. She hadn't posted in a while either before then. I think this used to be a sort of religiously checked thing, but not so much anymore. I think we used to do it to keep in touch, but now that our circle has kinda separated and spread out, I think it's kind of fallen to a checked once-in-a-while thing. I suppose that's not a bad thing. I would have posted sooner if I would have had the chance, but I have been at Susan's for the past month. So if I haven't really talked or hung out with any of you guys, it's not because I dislike you and am ignoring you, I just wasn't allowed out of the house. But I am out now, and extremely happy over it. I am at my mums house and perhaps starting sometime mid june I shall be able to go out and spend osme time with you guys more. I miss you all, and the good times we used to have. So even if you've forgotten me, I haven't ignored you all. Hope everyone is having a good summer, and that it shall be a fun one.Ttyl.

If any of you all still read this, I would like an honest answer.


What happened to us?

FINALLY!

I never though I'd say this, at least not until I was 18, but I GOT MY PERMIT!!Kick ass!Yes, I'm so happy! Hee hee. I really didn't think mum would let me get it, but she did. So very excited. And I've already been driving today, and I didn't hit anything, so I think it will be ok.And I passed with 100% the first time, so yes, but it's the actual driving test that I shall freak out on. But oh well, that's not for 6 months. 6 very long months...

sick

Yeah, I wasn't at school Monday because I was sick all weekend, and I wasn't there today because of the same reason. I really shouldn't have gone back yesterday, but I missed people, and I though I was feeling better.Obviously not. I didn't wake up until 1 today. Which I must admit, was nice, but with the way I felt yesterday, I was glad I didn't go to school today. I think I'll be there tomorrow though, because I don't want to stay home with mum, and I need to get my make-up work, I really am not looking forward to having to do a lot. So yeah, I hope you guys are feeling good,not sick, and stay that way. Because this sucks. Ttyl.

Looking for something stolen, Issy?

Yup, here it is, I stole it. Hee hee, I feel mischievious. Oh yes, because this was so bad girl, lol, have fun I guess.

http://kevan.org/johari?name=Notthecheese

Valentine's Day

Yes, today was Valentine's Day. And Maeghan wasn't in school because she was sick, which sucks. I hope she feels better. I missed her. And I still haven't decided if I like this day or not. I mean, it's really nice if you have someone, but not everyone does, and if you don't,this day just throws that in your face. Not the greatest feeling, it tends to make people feel bad, and I don't like that. I like making people feel good, happy, not bad. And seeing all the couples, all the PDA, just made me miss her more. And not just to do that, because we have both agreed that PDA is rude, and we don't do it, because it also can make people uncomfortable, but because I actually have someone this year. I never really did any other year, and it used to make me feel bad. I never made fun of couple, but just really hated being alone. I don't like doing that to people. This holiday is becoming more stupid too. It's becoming more of a candy company holiday than anything else. But anyways, I miss Maeghan, but I'm glad she didn't come to school today because being sick at school isn't fun. I hope she gets better. And tomorrow is will have been 11 months. Yay!





By the way, I had time to kill, so I made this, and you should all try it:

http://www.quizyourfriends.com/yourquiz.php?quizname=060214195610-924860&

3 weeks

I would have posted yesterday, but I went to bed early and didn't get the chance to. It's been 3 weeks since I've done anything stupid, and I plan on it staying that way. I realize what it does to my friends, and I can't do that to you guys anymore.I've been really happy the past 3 weeks, and it's been really nice. I'm not quite sure why I have been, but I'm definitely not complaining about it. The past 2 days have a been a little harder, but I'm all right. I wasn't in school today because I really don't feel good. I went to bed at 7 yesterday and I didn't get up until 10:30 this morning. Mum says that this weekend is to be a family weekend. I think I was home enough, and have done enough work over the past 2 weekend to not have to have a family weekend. Just thinking about that puts me into a bad mood. I'm trying to work my way out of it. Mum says that I have a lot of chores to do,my regular and she really wants me to tackle cleaning this house up. It needs it, but that doesn't mean that I want it to be me who has to do it.I think that I shall do my regular chores and all the other things that I know she wants to get done this weekend today, and maybe then I shall be able to get away this weekend. Both of them are being real bitches. Susan is being all yelling and because I said so, while mum is being all, no, I want you to do this. I dunno, it's just been a little harder to deal with them as time goes on. But maybe I'll be able to work something out. Right now, Susan is being worse than mum, so I'd personally rather be here for once than over there.Oh well. I think I shall go eat something and then get to work on my chores. Hope you had fun at school, haha! Although I don't know which I'd choose,lol...

001) Your Name: Sabrina Michelle Hooper
(002) Your Gender: girl
(003) Single: no
(004) Want to be: No way
(005) Your birth day: January 3, 1990
(006) Age you wish you were: 22
(009) The color of your eyes: hazel
(010) Piercings: ears
(012) Tattoos: not yet, but I plan on getting some

DO YOU...

(013) Smoke: haven't, and I never will smoke cigarettes
(014) Do drugs: not recently
(015) Read the newspaper: occasionally
(017) Talk to strangers who IM you: why not
(018) Take walks in the rain: I love the rain
(019) Drive: old enough
(020) Like to drive fast: Fast is bad
(021) Hurt yourself: intentionally, not recently

HAVE YOU EVER...

(022) Been out of the country: Mexico
(023) Been in love: yes
(024) Done drugs: yes
(025) Gone skinny dipping: maybe
(026) Had a surgery: sort of
(027) Ran away from home: several times
(028) Played strip poker: no
(029) Gotten beaten up: yes
(030) Been picked on: yes
(031) Been on stage: yes
(032) Slept outdoors: i like it
(033) Cried yourself to sleep: too many times
(034) Pulled an all-nighter: oh yes, but it can be a bitch
(036) Talked on the phone all night: nope
(038) Slept all day: yes
(039) Killed someone: no
(040) Made out with a stranger: yes
(041) Had sex with a stranger: yes
(042) Kissed the same sex: oh yes
(044) Been betrayed: yes
(045) Broken the law: yes
(046) Met a famous person: yes
(047) Been on the radio/TV: I dunno
(048) Been in a mosh pit: once
(049) Had a nervous breakdown: more than once
(050) Been criticized about your sexual performance: not that I know of
(051) Had a dream that kept coming back: several times, usually meant something

A COUPLE RANDOMS...

(052) Shoe brand: not sure, but they're comfortable
(053) School: atherton
(054) Wear hats: not usually, but I do like beanies
(055) Judged other people by their clothing: I have before
(056) Wear makeup: eyeliner
(057) Favorite place to shop: not much into shopping, but anyplace cheap like dollar stores, etc.(058) Favorite article of clothing: pants
(059) Are you trendy: probably not, don't really care

BELIEFS...

(060) Believe in life on other planets: yes, there has to be
(061) Miracles: I think
(062) Astrology: yes
(063) Magic: yes
(064) God: sure
(066) Santa: when I was younger
(067) Ghosts: yes
(068) Birth: yes
(069) Love at first sight: yes
(070) Yin and yang: yes
(071) Witches: yes
(072) Easter bunny: no

LOVE

(077) Do you remember your first love: yes
(078) Still love him/her: yes
(079) Do you consider love a mistake: no, never
(080) What do you find romantic: small things, like sweetness
(081) Turn-ons: sweetness, kissing
(082) Turn-off: smelliness, annoying
(083) Do you base your judgement on looks alone: no
(085) Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractive: yes
(086) Do you think the opposite sex finds you good looking: don't think so
(087) What is best about the opposite sex: physically, hands, otherwise, dominance
(088) What's the last present someone gave you: socks
(089) Do you like someone at this moment: I'd definetly call it more than like

LAST PERSON...

(090) That you laughed at: Maeghan
(091) That laughed at you: Maeghan
(092) That turned you on: Maeghan
(093) You went shopping with: my mum
(094) To disappoint you: sabrina(096) To make you cry: my mother
(097) To brighten up your day: Maeghan
(099) You saw a movie with: Maeghan
(100) You talked to on the phone: Eryn
(101) You talked to through IM: Maeghan
(102) Your 4 friends: Maeghan, Eryn, Grant, Tommy

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU...

(104) Smiled:today
(105) Laughed: earlier today
(106) Cried: few weeks ago
(107) Bought something: today, hair dye
(108) Danced: a few days ago
(109) Were sarcastic: earlier today
(110) Hugged/kissed someone: today
(111) Talked to an ex: month ago, I think
(112) Watched your favorite movie: too long ago
(113) Talked on the phone: a few hours ago
(114) Listened to the radio: few minutes ago, in the car
(115) Watched TV:yesterday, I think
(116) Went out: like, outside, today
(117) Helped someone: today
(119) Said "I love you" and meant it: yesterday
(120) Did something with someone you didnt want to do: a while ago

my hair

I dyed my hair! Yes, tis now purple with blue tips. I love it so. It's a light purple, but it's purple and it's awesome. I love my skills, because I got mum to say yes. She said yes to something! And if she would have changed her mind, I would have said too late.It was fun too, I had a good time at Eryn's. Alex did it. The freshman Alex, with the constantly color changin hair, she's really cool and good at it. My aunt is going to freak. She doesn't know that I did it, and I'm not telling her. I'm supposed to go to her work tomorrow, so I guess she'll find out then.Hee hee. And before mum let me she asked if I would swear that the dye isn't permanent. It's not. It's semi-permanent. Hee hee, pushing it I know, but still, not quite permanent. Oh, I've wanted to do this for a while, and I really needed a change.This shall be fun.

Sweet 16

Today is my birthday! Yay! I'm finally 16! I'd like to get my permit, and I hope I can soon. Maybe the end of this week, who knows. It's all up to mum. And I did go to school, after mum being all you can't stay home and then telling me (after I got up and showered and dressed with no chance of getting back to sleep) that I didn't have to go. But I decided to go anyway, see my friends, not have to do make-up work, and not stay home. But they weren't happy about that.Evidently, they wanted me too spend my 16th birthday with them. Mum was going to take me out to dinner, and Susan to breakfast, or something like sad. So they're all upset, and I'm not sure what to think. No, I didn't want to spend it with them, I prefer the company of my friends, even if we are in school. And besides, I had an awesome time at the Coffeehouse. Oh, it was great. One of the bands was just awesome. I want them to make a cd so that I can buy it. Eryn and I are both freaks, we love the bass and the drums, and this band was just amazing.Tommy's band was ok too, but they sounded a little muddy. I think it may have been the sound system.But the last band that we were able to stay and listen to was hilarious. We were outside, and the dude was humping the door. The door had glass, so we were able to see it. Then he went away, and came back with his pants off and proceeded to hump the window. Once again, we had a perfect view.Oh, it was funny. Overall, I think I had a pretty good day. But Maeghan doesn't feel good, and that makes me sad. I hope she gets to feeling better soon.

Ahh, the stealing

TEN FIRSTS:

First Best Friend: Issy
First Screen Name: don't remember
First pet: Noah, my cat
First Piercing: ears
First Celebrity Crush: Johnny Depp
First CD:Spice Girls
First Car: it shall be my grandma's red cavalier
First True Love: Maeghan
First Stuffed Animal: doggie
First Trip:Florida, when I was 1
______________________________________________

NINE LASTS:

Last Car Ride: yesterday, from Susan's to mum's
Last Movie Seen: Aristocats
Last Phone Call: Eryn
Last CD Played: Blink 182
Last Bubble bath: Couple months ago
Last time you Cried: last week
Last time you talked to the person you like: Right now
Last time you took a test: Two weeks ago- mid terms
Last time you drank a cup of milk: a few days ago
______________________________________________

EIGHT HAVE YOU EVERS:

Have you ever dated one of your best friends: Yes
Have you ever been arrested: no
Have you ever skinny dipped: nope
Have you ever been on tv: Yes
Have you ever kissed someone and then regreted it:yeah
Have you ever gone commando: yeah. though not too often
______________________________________________

SEVEN THINGS YOU'VE DONE TODAY:

Slept in
Took a shower
Talked to Eryn
Ate soup
Ate chocolate
Talked to Maeghan
Drank Ale81
______________________________________________

SIX PEOPLE YOU'RE FRIENDS WITH:

Maeghan
Eryn
Issy
Andrew
Grant
Tommy
______________________________________________

FIVE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING:

Green dragon pants
Black shirt
Bracelets
Black bra
Eyeliner
_____

FOUR PEOPLE YOU CAN TELL ALMOST ANYTHING TO:

Maeghan
Eryn
Grant
My blog
______________________________________________

THREE CHOICES

1. Hot or Cold: Cold, definetly

2. Black or white: black

3. Chocolate or Vanilla: vanilla ice cream, chocolate everything else

______________________________________________

TWO THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:

Sky dive and be content with myself.
______________________________________________

ONE PERSON YOU LOVE:

Maeghan

New Years

Well, christmas is over, and so is 2005. It's a new year. I wonder what that means. A lot happened last year, as we all know, some bad things, some good things.I don't know which out numbers which, I guess it depends on the person. I don't know if it was a good year or not. I know a lot happened that was bad, but some things happened that were good for me too. Like Maeghan, that is definetly a good thing.It makes me happy. I don't really know why I'm posting. Just something to do I guess. And it is new years day, and it kind of makes you think. I even went to church this morning. I haven't been in quite a while, and people were glad to see me. It was a long service too. It started at 11 and it wasn't over until 1. But that was good, as it got me out of the house for a bit. Right now I am at mum's house, but I think I'm going back to Susan's tomorrow. I doubt I'll be allowed to do anything with anyone, but if I am, someone let me know if they can do something, anything, doesn't really matter what.And we start back to school on Tuesday, of which I'm sure that you guys wanted to be reminded of, but that I doubt you forgot about. And I'll be 16. I think that's a good thing. It means I might be able to get my permit and liscence and get the fuck out of here.So yeah, I'm kinda happy about that. How was everyone's new years? I hope it was good for all. I'm gonna go do the laundry now.