Eve of Christmas Eve

Happiness presides over all in the land of Sabrina. Wow,I definetly just sounded like Issy right then. Oh well, twas fun. Speaking of which, I just got back from being over at Maeghan's for 3 days. Oh, how I wish I could live there. I would be happy forever. And warm, it would be nice. But alas, I don't think mum would like that.So far, I've spent 5 days over there this week. I didn't want to leave, but I had to. It has been awesome.And mum's pissed, of course, but I don't even care right now, though I suppose I shall later. Her parents seem to like me, a lot, so that is good, it makes things easier. I got christmas presents from them already. They got me socks and A Christmas Story. And I now have a very entertaining spongebob penis to play with. It makes me happy. And I still need to wrap mums christmas present (if only you guys could see it), though I think I shall wait until later.I think I must go now, and spend time with Grandma. So, I shall talk to you guys later.

Presents

I gave everyone their presents today. Well, all who came to school at least. cough *Andrew* cough. I hope you guys like them! Hee hee, some presents are more interesting than others, although I'm not talking about mine...Eryn.

Christmas presents

Ok people, I need you to tell me what you want for christmas, because I don't know and I'd like to get you something that you want and like. And I know that I do it, but it would be most helpful if you wouldn't say "you know me" or "I don't care" or something. You get the point. So yeah, be creative, have fun.

Snow!

It was the first snow of the year today! Although there wasn't much, and most of it was frozen rain, there was a little. It was beautiful. Oh how I love the snow. This is my favorite season. I don't know why, but I love winter. I love the cold, and the snow. Plus, everything in a blanket of white that you can sled over, or throw, or make snow angels in (cough *Eryn* cough).It's just a great season. And I love what it means. It means cold nights, but warmth, cuddled up under the covers with my person. Yeah, I know I'm pathetic, but I don't care. It's the perfect weather for hot chocolate and coffee, both of which I love. And we got off school early, which was awesome.So, I get to go over to Maeghans tomorrow, I get to spend the night at Eryn's Saturday ninght, and everything's good. Yay. Ok, well, I'm gonna go get my homework done and then get some sleep.

Stairs

Yeah, I fell down the stairs this morning. As in, all the way down. We have 14 stairs, I fell down 12. They are carpeted (thank god), but the floor at the bottom isn't. Grrrr. But I got up this morning at 6, because I didn't feel like getting up at 5 this time, and I go to the bathroom and start down the stairs. I think I either slipped and missed a step, or just missed a step, but either way, I fell. I remember starting to fall and hitting something, but I don't remember anything else until I realized that I was on the ground. And in a lot of pain. So, evidently, the fall knocked me unconcious. And I fell so hard that the sound woke mum up. Seriously. It takes a lot to wake her up, so that was a little freaky.You know what my first thought was? Ow. How about my second? Ow.My third was more along the lines of, what happened? Then my mum asked if I was fine. At this point I was still trying to figure that out myself, but if my fall woke her up, what do you think. Anyways, I got up and I was just a little tipsy.Little as in, I got up and hit the wall. Mum comes downstairs, and I get dressed for school. Yes, for some reason I was still getting ready for school. I dunno why, but my brain was saying that was the right and normal thing to do, so I did. I got dressed, mum went to work because she had to, and I went to school. My neck really started hurting me during first period, and my vision was blurred. So I called, and Susan said that she wouldn't pick me up, too busy. So mum took off work to come and get me. We then went to get x-rays and stuff. The x-rays were fine, which is good as I already have one neck injury and don't need another, but I do have a concussion. The doctor ordered that I don't go to school Tuesday, and he said that we'd see about Wednesday. He also ordered Hydrocodone for me, for the pain. Adult strength, full dosage, plenty of pills. But oh the pain without them.

On another note, Maeghan got her braces off today, which is awesome. Now she has a retainer. It must be weird, after having them in for that long. But I think it's good. So yeah, I won't even be able to see her until Wednesday at the earliest. Or anyone else for that matter. Oh yeah, and I got my hair cut today. Short. Oh well, I needed it.So, I think I'm going to go, the pills are kicking in.

Well, mum said that this is going to be a family weekend. We ended up going to grandma's for dinner, which is good because her food is actually edible and tastes pretty good. We stayed there until 9 and then we came home. Before that, mum picked me up and we went to the vet to pick up our puppy who had just been spayed. She was so pitiful, it was cute. But yeah, we have some not so good news about some of our pets. Susie, mum's dog but to whom I'm still attached, might have cancer. She has a tumor in her tail, and it's been there, but it's starting to grow, and growing means cancerous. Mum is going to take her in Thursday. And if it is cancer, there is nothing they can do because of where it's located. It's too far up on her tail to take off her tail and its to big to operate. So that's not good. And mum and I are going to have to take Sam and Sarah in to the vet to het their rabies shots. We have been holding off, because my cat Megan got cancer from the rabies shot, and so did one other cat in the family and it killed him. But the shot is mandatory, it is illegal not to get it for them. So I'm really scared about that. And Nakota is getting up there in age, and his hips are really starting to hurt him. He has hip displasia, which is common in Huskies, and so he has really bad hips. I can't stand to see him hurting, but I don't want to lose him either. But I have to do what's in his best interest. That choice will be hard. Plus 2 of our cats are getting old, about 15, so I don't know how much longer they will be either.So yeah, worried about my animals.

And mum and I got into another arguement. It was in the car while we were running around everywhere. She started talking about religion, and asking me what mine was. Yeah, I'm baptised, but that doesn't mean that I am a total Christian either. I told her that I really didn't wanna talk about it because it never leads anywhere good. And I was right, it didn't. But she insisted, and said that it was a harmless question. So I told her that I do believe in God, but that I think that the Bible is a fake, and that I believe that God is whoever or whatever you or I choose to make it. She asked if I believed in an afterlife and stuff. I said that I believe in heaven and hell and all that stuff, but that I believed that I was going to heaven because I said so, that you didn't have to do anything special. I also believe in reincarnation.Well, anyways, before I said anything she said that she wouldn't discount what I said. She did. To be honest, I don't care. She doesn't have to believe what I do. She doesn't have to like it either. But she started talking about how the Bible was true, but just not to the word, and going on this lecture about how she came to believe what she does, blah blah blah. I have told her countless times that I am uncomfortable talking about religion with her, and it annoys me that she continues to do so. It also gets on my nerves how she always starts talking about religion with someone and what happened in her life to make her feel that way and stuff. People are always so amazed. I dunno why it annoys me, it just does. It's a pet peeve of mine. And I have a right to my opinion. She always tells me that I don't have to listen, that I could leave, but whenever I do, she always yells at me later about how rude and disrespectful it was. So I prefer to just not get into it with her. Plus today, like she always does, it somehow led to our problems and how I'm always using her as the scapegoat, always hurting her feelings, making her feel bad, doing it on purpose, how I hate her and why. But it's not true. I don't hate her.There are only a few people in my life that I hate, and none of them are her. And I don't like hurting people, whether it be on accident or on purpose, no matter how I feel about them.That's just not me. I have too much of a conscience for it.So she got all pissed off, and I wasn't exactly happy, and we get to Grandma's door and we're still arguing. Grandma had been worried because mum had called her at 3 to say that we were on her way. Well, we got there at 5:45. Mum didn't call her to tell her that we had a few errands to run before we came over. She goes and tells Grandma that I chose not to call. Sure, I was at Susan's house which has a phone, but I hadn't known that she had talked to Grandma, and we never called. She could have just as easily picked up the phone. She chose not to.So Grandma was freaking out, thinking we had crashed or something, and mum blames that on me, like everything else, and what a horrible person I am. So yeah, neither one of us were happy, and it was pretty tense. But anyways, that's over, nothing I can do about it now. I put a new poem up at Allpoetry, and I feel bad about what made me write it, but it's over and done with, and I can't undo it now.

And I feel really bad about mum. I hate the fact that I'm constantly talking bad about her. This weekend is the anniversary of the death of my brother. I know that's hard for her. And I feel bad about not being compassionate and understanding about that. I mean, she lost a child. That would feel awful. I couldn't imagine it. Mum has been through a lot in her life, she had a pretty shitty childhood. I can't blame her for that. If anything, it makes me feel bad about disliking her, and talking about her. I don't have it that bad.I can deal. And I keep thinking about how I would feel if she died. I know that no matter how much I dislike her at times, I would still feel bad, and probably worse if we hadn't reconciled and I had been talking about her behind her back.So I dunno what to do. I just needed to get this out. I guess I'd better go to bed, but not like I'm gonna get any sleep with this much on my mind.













Yes, I do realize that I just wrote about mum and I argueing and how I don't like her and then turned around and wrote about how I felt bad about talking about her. But I'm just really confused right now.

thanksgiving

Today is thanksgiving, and I'm currently at my grandma's. I know this is corny and all, but I guess I need a little optimism right now, so I'm gonna list some things that I am happy to have at the moment.

-First and foremost, Maeghan. I'm really happy, and lucky, to have her, and I enjoy all the time we spend together though it is never enough.

-Friends.I know that we are all going through a lot right now, and not all of us may be happy, but we're still here, and we still have a chance to work it out.

-My grandma. Although I may not want to admit it, she is getting old and may not be around for many more of these type of things. I really love her, she is an awesome person, and I'll miss her when she's gone.

-I guess I'm even happy that I have a semi-family. I mean, yeah, we don't always get along, but at least I do have a home.

-Pumpkin pie, weird I know, but I'm hungry, and it is reeeeeally good.

So, I hope that you all have a semi-decent Thanksgiving, even though most of us do have to spend it with family, and some that we aren't too fond of, but I hope you can still find a way to enjoy it.










Damn, that really was optimistic, wasn't it?

Boredom

If you fill this out, I'll do the same for you. I haven't done this in a while, and I felt like doing it again.Lol, and if it's easier, or you just feel like it, you could email it to me. So yeah, have fun. I'm a loser, I know, but I don't care.

what would you do if I?
1. I made a move on u:
2. I kissed you:
3. I lived next door to you:
4. I started smoking:
5. I asked you on a date:
6. I was hospitalized:
7. I ran away from home:
8. I got into a fight and you weren't there?
9. i asked u out?:

:WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY::
9. Personality:
10. Eyes:
11. Hair:
12. Body:

::WOULD YOU::
13. Be my friend?
14. Keep a secret if I told you one?
15. Hold my hand?
16. Go on a date with me?
17. Keep in touch?
18. Try and solve my problems?
19. Love me?
20. Date me?:

:HAVE YOU EVER::
21. Lied to make me feel better?
22. Wanted to kiss me?
23. Wanted to kill me?
24. Broke my heart?
25. Kept something important from me?:

:AND MORE::
27. Who are you?
28. Are we friends?
29. When and how did we meet?
30. Describe me in one word:
31. What was your first impression?
32. Do you still think that way about me now?
33. What reminds you of me?
34. If you could give me anything what would it be?
35. How well do you know me?
36. When's the last time you saw me?
37. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
38. Are you gonna put this on yours to see what I say about you?

Hee hee, long, but hey, it's something to do.

Aphrodite/Eros

?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Bi/Slightly Gay
You scored -12 (-52 being completely gay, 0 being bisexual, and 52 being completely straight) For the most part, you are bisexual. You have a slight preference for the same gender, but either gender would suit you. If you are sexually inexperienced, it is possible that this will change after you do some experimenting.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: %20alt="free%20online%20dating"%20src=" Single or Group Dates: single Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: nestea Chocolate or Vanilla: chocolate Cappuccino or Coffee: cappuccino Do you Smoke: no Do you Swear: yes Do you Sing: in the shower Do you Shower Daily: yes Have you Been in Love: yes Do you want to go to College: yes Do you want to get Married: someday Do you belive in yourself: sometimes Do you get Motion Sickness: yes Do you think you are Attractive: sometimes Are you a Health Freak: no Do you get along with your Parents: no Do you like Thunderstorms: i love them Do you play an Instrument: yes In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: yes In the past month have you Smoked: no In the past month have you been on Drugs: no In the past month have you gone on a Date: yes In the past month have you gone to a Mall: yes In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: yes In the past month have you eaten Sushi: no In the past month have you been on Stage: no In the past month have you been Dumped: no In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: no In the past month have you Stolen Anything: no Ever been Drunk: yes Ever been called a Tease: no Ever been Beaten up: no Ever Shoplifted: yes How do you want to Die: not right now What do you want to be when you Grow Up: something to do with animals What country would you most like to Visit: france In a Boy/Girl.. Favourite Eye Color: doesn't matter Favourite Hair Color: doesn't matter Short or Long Hair: doesn't matter Height: doesn't matter Weight: doesn't matter Best Clothing Style: doesn't matter Number of Drugs I have taken: depends on definition of drugs Number of CDs I own: too many to count Number of Piercings: 2, but i want more Number of Tattoos: none, but i want some Number of things in my Past I Regret: too many to count CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS! cuddle and a kiss on the forehead - you like to be close to your special someone and feel warm, comfortable, and needed What Sign of Affection Are You? brought to you by Bambi Which DISNEY character are you most like? brought to you by Quote: Standing in a crowded room but why do I still feel alone You hide lonlieness. You feel as if no one is there even if someone is right there talking to you. You think that they don't know or understand the real you. People seem to shun you out and ignore you because they don't notice you a lot since you keep to yourself. People don't see all you want is someone to notice you the real you. Someone to stay by yourside and be with you so that you are not alone. You feel as if you will be alone forever. You wonder why everyone ignores you. So you think that there must be something wrong with you. And you begin to hate yourself. You try and change but that didn't do anything they still don't seem to care or they notice you but you still can't help but feel alone. Don't worry I know how that feels. You have to wait for a day when you find someone worth your love. Because the love you've kept inside will prove its worth then. One day you'll find someone. You just have to be willing to wait and if you do your reward will be great ~We all hide something from the world...What do you hide~(with beautiful dark pictures) brought to you by RAVEN EYES You have Raven Eyes! Positive Traits: Intellectual, Wise, Experienced, Honest, Trustworthy Negative Traits: Pompous, Condescending, Withdrawn, Pessimistic, Depressed Your eyes are the windows to your soul. What type of eyes do you have? brought to you by

Just Posting

Yeah, I just feel like posting something. So I am. Today is Sunday, and a hell of a day at that. And it's not over yet. I wish it was. Right now I'm at my grandma's, but we shall be leaving soon and going back home. I'll be spending the night at mum's tonight. Oh well, it was worth it, because I got to see Maeghan.That was awesome. Yeah, I spent the night at her house Friday, and that was pretty cool. Then I was with her most of the day on Saturday as well, which was fun. I was supposed to spend the night at Eryn's Saturday night, but Susan called and told me that mum had changed her mind and that I couldn't. I had talked to mum Friday afternoon, and she told me that I had Friday and Saturday to do what I wanted, but that I had to be home by 2 on Sunday. I specifically asked if I could spend both nights as someone's house. She said yes. Mind you, all this didn't happen without a price, but I was going to be able to spend 2 nights with Maeghan and hang out with all my friends. And then mum changes her mind. I love how she can do that.Oh yeah, today was definetly one hell of a day. But I guess I should be happy that I didn't have to go home until 10. And I got to see the Pest (which was awesome), But I'm A Cheerleader (that was beautiful), and Coyote Ugly. No comment needed for that one.So, all in all, damn good 2 days. Oh, and on Tuesday Maeghan and I will have been dating for 8 months. Isn't that awesome? Hee hee, I love it. Maybe we could do something, like the movies. I dunno, and that's only if I can anyways. But I shall try. See you guys tomorrow, I gots to go back to the house to do more work.And yes, I just said gots.