Last Week

So this year is pretty much over, and I'm sitting here thinking about all that has happened. I'm not sure what to think. There have been some really good times, and some really bad ones too. I think it's safe to say that this year has been the hardest. I do wonder what will happen over the summer, and next year. What else will change? Who else will change? I'm more confused now than I've ever been. This spring sun and weather feels soooo nice. Don't get me wrong, I love winter, tis my favorite season, but I think the sun was much needed. It gives me the breaks that I need, the feeling that I need, to keep me from going completely crazy. I love it. I just wish I could be out in it more often than I am. I miss things. I miss people. I miss going to parks, playing sports, just being outside. Oh, and I have a job now, for those who don't know already. Yeah, I'm working at the Cabbage Patch. 5 days a week, about 8 am - 7 pm. Someone shoot me now. Please? Or save me, either works. Well, I guess that's it for now.

A lot has changed this year. I've lost a lot of friends, found out who my real ones were, gotten horrible grades, lost someone, and I myself have changed. I'm not who I used to be. I don't like who I've become. I'm sorry to anyone and everyone for anything I've done. If I've offended you, or been a bitch, or mean, or anything, I'm sorry. I'm not really sure who I am anymore. I used to go be with tons of people and enjoy it, and just have fun. Now I rarely want to be around anyone, know very few people, am mean all the time, and I don't really fit in anywhere. I want to be who I used to be, things to be the way they used to be. But I guess those days are gone.